Happy Hang-Over

I am in an exceptionally good mood. A happy hang-over, as I have come to term it. It results from an extremely positive experience, the effects of which hasn't worn off yet. And it feels so good. *smile*


Ghost. Fish. Deformed Japanese doll. Lib Sci. McDreamy. Alimango. Elevator moment. Endless photo ops. Silver slippers. Text hugs. Real hugs. Hmmm... *smile again*


Can't explain. Don't want to attempt to. I'll just be smiling, inside and out.

The End of an Era

I AM OFFICIALLY UNEMPLOYED.

Wahaha, that's looking at the glass half-empty.

I AM OFF TO START DOING GREAT THINGS!!! YEAH!

Now that's glass half-full.

Perspectives matter a lot, don't they?


*****

Graduation. The end of an era, so to speak. And an it era it was. I always expected college to be rich in learning. I was going to UP so there was no doubt about that. But I never expected it to be this FULL. It seems like an entire lifetime just happened in four short years. I was born, learned to walk, learned to talk, grew up, played, studied (oh yeah, in fairness to me i did study, haha), failed even if I studied, failed because I didn't study, succeeded, got serious, got silly, got passionate about something, got hurt, got over the hurt, got fired (kind of), loved, loved and lost, loved and lost and then saved what was lost, died (of course, that's in a figure of speechish way), had a family, had children (15, i think... i lost count. but produced just one boy, haha.), did wrong, was done wrong to, accepted apologies, said my own sorries, had fun, got stressed out, relaxed, had lots of happy moments, vacationed, traveled, had family problems (ahaha), researched, and so on and so forth. Oh yes I learned. I learned A LOT. About relationships, love, pain, friendships, work, growing up. And of course, let us not forget the law of supply and demand and the basic accounting principles of debit and credit, that constitute half of my learnings about pain (haha). As a good friend of mine put it, she has never felt as ALIVE as she had felt the past four years. Now that everything's over and done with, I look back and see that college was more than what I expected it to be...and I'm glad that it turned out that way.

*****

New phase in life = new face of blog!!! And that explains my new blog template. Although nothing much changed (no additional "techy" features like counters or tagboards and no additional "creative" features as well), it just seemed a fitting way to jumpstart this new period in my life. And I'm tired of the blue background thing too.

Nakakuha ng Buwelo

Akala ko nakakuha na ako ng buwelo. Ilang paksa na rin ang naisip ko na ilagay at ipost dito kaya lang walang natutuloy. Tapos, kakagaling ko lang sa blog ng isa kong kaibigan..naiinggit ako sa kanya bigla, dire-direcho lang sha ng kasasalita. Gusto kong magsalita na ayaw. Ewan. Sa mga ganitong panahon, naaalala ko kung bakit mga sampung buwan ko rin hindi ipinaalam sa iba na may blog ako.

Back from Galera

And I'm definitely darker! Woohoo! And I definitely saw for a fact that fish do move in schools and that some of them glow fantastically underwater. And that they don't glow like that when taken out of the water (that tidbit is according to Marine Science Maggie, hehe). And that White Beach doesn't always have a night life. And that Bucky is the next American Idol (wahahahaha, OH BOY!). And that we all have to get rid of this "Arvon Accent" or else we won't get accepted to any notable company. And that UL may have "bouncing" as a fallback is ever he doesn't pursue a career in economics or advertising. And that Lags can still get darker (oh yes, that is true. and there's proof, haha.). And that driving a speedboat is even more thrilling than riding the banana boat that it pulls behind it. And that everyone should watch the Carebears Panda episode and learn a little something about life from it. And that I have the tendency to stick to order one dish when eating in a particular restaurant. And that you should bring the digicam battery charger along with you or else you'll end up with just eight pictures, all of them in the bus going to the final destination. And that sometimes you don't get to see the sunrise or the sunset but nevertheless, still consider the entire day as one heck of a sight to behold.

Nice Quote

I make a wish but then she says she doesn't believe in shooting stars.
-- Too Much To Believe, Spring-Time Flowers

Reminds me of someone. Someone who doesn't believe in the magic of the stars. Someone who doesn't believe in the magic of the stars ANYMORE. Because, he said, they always fail. Because wishes made on them don't ever come true.

I, on the other hand, love the stars. In the beginning it was just due to a childish association, but now it's because of the way they shine at night, in the dark, dark sky. Because of those stars, I shall never fear the night completely. And thus, another nice quote, a personal favorite:


Though my soul may sit in darkness it shall rise in perfect light. I have loved the stars so fondly to be fearful of the night.

A good friend of mine texted a quote about love and getting hurt because of love...which led me to this realization: I have had my heart broken many times in my life, but not one of those times was caused by a romantic relationship. Weird, because though I don't actually know how being heartbroken because of love life feels, the pain of having one's heart broken by other things hurts just as much, maybe even more.

And this is because love life or not, human beings love. And whether it be love for an organization, a group, a person, family, entity, as long as you've given a part of yourself to it and have devoted time and care and effort in nurturing it, you unwittingly make yourself vulnerable to possibly getting hurt by it. The more you love, the deeper it gets, the greater the chance of whatever it is that you have loved to hurt you back. A big risk, yes, but definitely a risk worth taking.

Loving is not focusing on the imperfections of whatever it is you love. It is looking beyond these imperfections and still seeing something perfect nevertheless. It is stopping to think about the reason why someone you love brushed you off and not taking it at face value... it is understanding, and devoting time and effort to understand. Because that is what love is all about. It involves the inspiration to take something as is and transform it into something it could be. Love is not complacent. Sometimes it is even too aggressive, to a point it can become annoying. But again, it is imperative to look for a deeper reason underneath all that because, sadly, intentions may not be delivered well. But that doesn't make those intentions any bad. It is a cycle of inputs and outputs where you get what you give....


*****

Thank God for tear glands. When words fail at release, they act as stand ins and serve their purpose.

I so want to write...

... but I find myself not being able to. Sheesh. Too many stuff on my mind to unload without an outlet for release. Pretty dank picture. Come to think of it, I wouldn't be able to release it anyway. Because the walls have eyes and the floor, ears. And because the internet is a mighty, mighty invention...whose inventor my tp and I shall acknowledge in the thank-you part of our thesis. And I suppose because I just read a short story written by someone I have a high regard for and is still in the process of being moved by the accurate details placed carefully anf purposefully within the piece and the provocative effect it possesses overall. And I know I must sound like an incoherent, sleepy girl attempting to create a blog entry worth reading. And I am an incoherent, sleepy girl attempting to create a blog entry worth reading. Blah. I should just go back to reading DECEPTION POINT instead of blogging in the wee hours of the morning.

Da April Fools Post

Nung isang araw, nagtext ang kaibigan kong ULTIMATE Globe text non-stop user (feeling ko sa aming lahat sa phonebook niya na Globe users) ng katanungang ito: Bakit kailangan may umaalis? Aba, shempre ako, sagot na sagot naman (oo, sumasagot talaga ako lagi sa mga tanong niya, kahit gaano kababaw pa o kalalim, hehe). Anu nga ba yung mga sinagot ko? Hmmm...eto:


- dahil ganun talaga ang buhay, kailangan may mga phase na nagtatapos para makasulong sa bagong yugto naman

- para makapag-grow. kase kung dun ka na lang forever, baka hindi ka na mag-grow

- kase pinapaalis na ng sapilitan (hehe)

- to make way for the new

Basically, yan ang mga sagot ko. Ngayon, dadagdagan ko iyang mga sagot na yan.


- dahil magkakaiba na ang gusto at hinahanap

- para malaman kung gaano kahalaga ang kung anong meron ka habang di pa umaalis

- upang ma-emphasize ren kung ano ang ang mga dahilan kung bakit ka nagstay in the first place

- para masubok ang tatag ng kung anong meron

- para pumunta kung saan ka mas masaya

- upang hanapin ang sarili


Tunay na bitter-sweet ang paglisan. Hmm...Hindi talaga ako mahusay sa pagdadala ng mga ganitong bagay.